"~'o.:SeReNDiPiTy:.o'~"

i'm Not SUPER!!

I really hate it
when people say that i'm a super girl.
UgHhHhHh..!!
They don't know wat its like to be me..
Dat I'm forced to be strong..

Really hate it when I need a hand
I dunno wat to say..
Coz there they are..
Juz stand and stare..
Thinking that super girl can do everything..

So sad when I need a shoulder to cry on
He juz looked at me..thinking
'She's a super girl..she can handle it..'

I need someone who can see me as the real me..
I'm being strong because I HAVE TO..
Coz they din give me space to cry..

I like to cry myself to sleep late at nite..
Where people don't need to see the weak side of me..
They won't believe it even if they see..
So wats the point..

For them i'll always be the super girl..
Its funny how i hate to be called like dat..
Telling you guys..
IM NOT SUPER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !*&)*&$)@*&)@#*%&)@(*&!)*&!!!

posted by Rin @ 12:22 AM 0 comments

Longing to be a litte girl..

I remember when i was a girl..
Playing around happily with my toys..
Though i still had things to do..
But it didn't bother me much..
I enjoyed my life while hoping to grow up faster..

Time flies and now i'm grown up..
Still have so many things to do..
But these things bother me much now..
Dun have time to stop back and relax..
Have no time to enjoy life..

Its really an irony..
Now dat i'm a grown up..
I really wish to be a little girl..
Playing around happily with my toys..

posted by Rin @ 11:48 PM 0 comments

oio

posted by Rin @ 9:05 AM 0 comments

I Will Survive

I've been thru quite a lot of things these past few days..
And so i've learned another thing
That changes have been happening rapidly in people's lives..

One moment you were a strong, powerful man..
In split second you found yourself lying hopelessly..

One moment you were enjoying your wonderful and complete life..
In split second it changed into your worst nightmare..

One moment you called him your bestfriend and lover..
In split second you guys turned into strangers..

One moment you had everything you've ever wanted in life..
In split second all of it were taken away from you..

It's so scary when you realize..
How fast things keep on changing in this high-speed-life..
Nowhere to go..nowhere to run..

I juz lifted my head up..looking far beyond the horizon..
And I felt the ONE who's promising the best for me,
still holding my hands..
Then I know that.. no matter what happens..

I will survive..

posted by Rin @ 8:50 AM 1 comments

posted by Rin @ 9:03 AM 0 comments

be grateful..

been so tired lately.. got dis flu since last week.. sore throat..
watever..u name it..its all in me..ughh..=(

i dunno wat i've been doing is a rite thing or not.. been clinging
to something thats not even there enimor.. how come i take
for granted what i have rite now ya..? sometimes i really wish
Daddy cud bang me quite hard..hard enuf to make me see wat
i have now and be grateful for dat.. but its juz hard..to let go
someone u really wished for..

Sometimes im so grateful for the comfort and fun things i got..
but sometimes its juz not enuf.. those comfort 'n fun things
can't cover it up..and i'm still missing those moments so bad..
really if anyone cud tell me plz how to let go.. to move on..
to stand up and be brave..

i wonder..how long will i stand this.. its really hard and painful
too see him so far.. juz trying to say to myself..
over and over again..
hang on.. be brave..
u've a'dy got wat u need now..
be grateful..

posted by Rin @ 10:46 PM 0 comments

My li'le ones..

The school's been starting for about a week now..
I got 11 li'le angels *or u can say devils st..* They're sooooooo cute..
I'm handlin the pre-nursery class..its for 2-3-year-old kids..

Got this girl named Valerie *lili*.. she's so cute..my partner says she
looks like 'dora' the cartoon thing *i don't really know which
cartoon* .. Lili's so cute and very smart..she knows all about
3 basic colors a'dy *blue, red, yellow*, 3 basic shapes *circle, square,
triangle* and she speaks 3 languages *english, mandarin, and bahasa*
I really like her..tho' sometimes she's moody but she's one of my
favorite in class.. Talking with her sometimes improves my mandarin
too u know.. *teachers gotta learn..* hahahha..

Another one, I got Sky..this one is mixed indo-korean..he's soooo
handsome..really! handsome one.. But he's so cranky..he's been in
school before..but he's very close to his auntie..*even closer than to
his mom I suppose* I like the way he talks.. He cried badly last friday
coz I din let his auntie in the class.. I tried to talk with him one on one..
He kept on crying..but he really understood what I was saying.. He's
gramatically good for kid his age.. Got this one time he yelled, 'Sky
mau mainnnnn!!' I told him to speak nicely..then suddenly he changed
the tone of his voice..looked straight into my eyes..and said softly..
'Miss..sky mau main..' ughh..me melted that exact moment..hahah..

Next one..Evan.. this one is very cranky..more than Sky. He was
screaming soooooo badly when he came for trial class with his mom..
He din wanna go into the class..stayed in the front office and cried..
His mom said that he's afraid to get in coz our building looks a bit
like the saloon where he used to get his hair cut.. He hates going to
saloon.. They went home that day without having the trial class..
The next day he showed up without mommy, only with nanny and
his driver. This time even worse..he din wanna get out of the car.
It took me and my partner half and hour..in his car..on that hot day
to make him go into our class.. But then we succeeded..he was one
of the best and nicest student in our class now..

The worst one is Aurielle.. Me and all the teachers think that
maybe she got this autistic behaviour.. She keeps on screaming
and crying without any good reason..ignoring people..banging
herself when we tried to hug her..and less eye-contact..
I take pity on her mom..she looks very sad and frustrated when
she saw her li'le girl in our class.. Me myself can't take good control
of her.. We really think that she need special treatment..
But its only our speculation ..gotta observe more..

I love them..watsoever angels or devils..they're so cuteee..

posted by Rin @ 7:45 PM 0 comments

a year..

Its been a year now..
I shud've started to trust him more
but the truth is I can't..
I shud've be grateful for what I have now but dunno why
I got this big whole inside..
I hate this jealousy thing..
Everytime he mentioned a girl's name
I went crazy..
Been trying to convince myself that..even if I loose him
It really won't affect me much..
Guess I'll never know 'til it happens..
Dun wanna make the same mistake..
but the truth is I've been making the same one..
Over and over again..
Dunno when to stop..
Dunno how to stop..
Dunno what to say..
Dunno how to say..

There's a havoc happenin in my life..
Time to settle down and sweep it off.

posted by Rin @ 7:14 PM 0 comments

go harry potter!

I finally got my harry potter last saturday.. huakakakka..
been waiting..'n waiting..'n waiting..'n then pufffff..
july 16..harry potter's on da wayyy..its actually
in my room now..heiuehihe.. Go Rowling goooo!

Actually i wasn't in my best mood today.. I juz felt that
i got no one who really understands me..even my closest
ones..but then again i realized that everyone surely got
something in particular that makes others cant really
understand u even if they wanted to.. I juz have this
stupid feeling..everything's juz not enuf for me..
i don't know if i a'dy got the best one
for me..but even when people think that it's the best for me..
its juz not enuf..

I wanted to stop all my routines..juz to clear up my mind..

Ughhhhhh..is it juz me?

posted by Rin @ 11:25 PM 0 comments